


wake up in moloch! light streaming out of the sky!

by Wolvesandwerewolves



Series: I’m With You in Rockland [16]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Gen, Schizophrenia, Schizophrenia/Schizoaffective Disorder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:27:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26427850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolvesandwerewolves/pseuds/Wolvesandwerewolves
Summary: Diego goes to their apartment late at night. It’s cold.
Relationships: Diego Hargreeves & Ben Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves
Series: I’m With You in Rockland [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1865728
Comments: 13
Kudos: 102





	wake up in moloch! light streaming out of the sky!

**Author's Note:**

> sup fam, sorry my updates are getting slower and slower, i still <3 u i promise 
> 
> Anyways, i tried to write this from vanya’s pov. And klaus’s. And ben’s. And now here we are...finally something from diego. he’s like a burnt marshmallow, looking rough on the outside but inside he is ~squishy~ and ~sweet~ 
> 
> anyways as always, not super happy with the ending? wasn’t sure how to end it? but I’m happy with most of it and so here we are

It’s a little past midnight by the time he gets to Vanya’s. 

And it’s _freezing_. The bitter kind of cold, that stings your skin red, seeps inside to freeze and fuse your bones. Diego is drenched with it. The hood of his sweatshirt is heavy against the back of his neck, tiny droplets sliding down his spine and making him shudder. 

He could have sworn he left his jacket in the backseat. 

Instead, he grabbed one of Ben’s, folded up and wrinkled, shoved down inside a box of his other things. It’s almost tight on him, in the shoulders and by the wrists, uncomfortably _not his, it’s Ben’s._ It doesn’t even smell like him, anymore. Maybe it does and he just can’t remember. 

Mom packed most of his things away, after. And she hugged Diego when he saw it and cried. She kissed him on the cheek, told him to take it with him, said that Ben wouldn’t mind. 

And Klaus says, now, that he doesn’t mind. Mom was right. It still feels wrong on him, somehow. He wishes Ben were the one wearing it.

Dad probably doesn’t even know he has it, probably doesn’t care in the way that he doesn’t care about most things, except himself and his army—and the thought of his father makes Diego tremble more, makes his heart tighten in his chest, taking up too much space inside and making it hard to breathe. 

He still doesn’t know if Dad— _did anything_. It still angers him to think of that night months ago, when Klaus, pale and sweaty and terrified (of _him_ , like he was their father, and that’s something else Diego doesn’t want to think about) told them Dad killed Ben. 

It’s been ages since then, and Diego feels like he’s learned nothing. 

_Dad killed Ben,_ Klaus said, and then he had a seizure and stopped breathing. _Dad killed Ben,_ in the backseat with his head resting in Vanya’s lap. _Dad killed Ben_ , shaking and crying, being strapped down to a bed and begging. _Dad killed Ben._

Sometimes he can’t stand it. 

But a distraction is nice. Even one this late at night. He wasn’t sleeping, anyway. 

He parks close to the building, just across the street from the entrance. Wind blows tiny, piercing ice crystals harsh at his face as he runs, leaving his cheeks numb and eyes watery. Snow builds up onto the fabric of his sweatshirt, jacket left open and unzipped. The stagnant air of the hall when he steps inside the building is stifling, but warm. Diego sighs.

He walks down the halls, stops at her door. She must hear him, though, because Vanya opens it before he even knocks. She sighs with something like relief when she sees him, eyebrows knit in worry and mouth pursed in. 

They’ve been getting closer for months now, but every time he sees her she still looks—uncomfortable. On edge. He doesn’t know if it’s him or if it’s her—but she called. 

And really, he had nothing else better to do, except read and reread the same stupid ‘evidence’ he’s been reading every single goddamn night, with nothing to show for it. 

Diego forces himself to think of the situation at hand.

“Hey,” he says. 

Vanya smiles, takes a shaky breath, like she’s hesitating or doesn’t know how to respond. “Thanks for coming. Sorry for—always calling so late.”

Diego smiles. “No worries,” he says, stepping inside. 

“I—” Vanya clears her throat, shifts next to him, and the fabric of her long sleeved band t-shirt brushes against his—Ben’s—jacket. “I wouldn’t go that far.”

The lights in her apartment are off. With the door open, harsh lighting from the hallway sweeps in, two silhouettes cut out in exaggerated shapes against the glittering floor. Broken glass reflects on the rug, only just visible. 

“I thought I was getting a hang of things,” Vanya says. Her voice is high and thick, and it wavers with frustration he’s familiar with. 

Thunder rolls just outside, shaking the old walls, rattling the windows. He feels Vanya shift at the sound. Lightning illuminates the room a few seconds later—the dark grey couch, dark blue blanket draped just over the back, the mandalic design of the rug covering stains on the thin carpet, the curved shape of her violin case, leaning against the wall to his left. 

Diego has good control of his own powers. He learned it harshly, through cut fingers, stinging and staining through the bandaids Mom gave him; the holes in his bedroom walls from target practice, late at night with no one to witness it, the bruises on his shins and wrists—and mouthfuls of water, caught in his throat, gagging and choking back a helpless cry. 

It had taken him years to feel at ease with what he can do. By now, throwing knives or holding his breath is a second instinct, easy and natural. Growing up was tough. 

He still hates their father. For the scars on his fingertips, for the glass on the ground in his sister’s apartment, for Ben’s ghost and Klaus’s nightmares. 

“Shit happens,” he says, and shrugs.

Vanya gives him a watery laugh. “I took one of Klaus’s pills—the ones Dad gave us when we were kids. Just for tonight.”

_Right_ , Diego thinks. Klaus doesn’t like seeing ghosts, except for Ben. He remembers back in December, his room next to his brother’s, listening to his high-pitched voice through the thin walls. And when they were kids, the drawings Mom always put away, of abstract monsters with scribbled marker blood and stick figure arms broken off from their messy bodies. 

He grimaces. His father’s anger comes to him far too easily. 

Glass crunches underneath the soles of his boots as he walks through the living and dinning room. Vanya shuts the door behind him, and the light on the ground eclipses back to cold darkness. Diego fishes a flashlight out of his sweatshirt pocket, clicks it on and shines it over the broken ceiling fan, the fractured lightbulbs and splintered wooden blades. 

“Good job,” he drawls. Vanya huffs. He rolls his eyes, even though his back is to her. Thunder sounds again, lightning flashing immediately after. The storm is getting closer. “You’re getting stronger,” he says. “Like I said, shit happens. You wanna know how many knives I bent when I was learning? Or how many chairs Luther accidentally broke?”

“It’s been _months,”_ Vanya says, as if she should have everything figured out by now. “I’ve been practicing since _December.”_

Diego turns around, rolls his eyes again and makes it obvious she’s a dumbass. “Yeah. _Months_. You’re still learning. Jesus Christ, give yourself a break, Vanya.”

Vanya sighs. She bites her lip, eyebrows still pinched together. “Yeah, okay.”

Diego sighs. “You guys can stay at my place tonight. We can pick up Klaus later. You okay to drive?” 

Thunder crashes above them, louder than before, and with it comes a bright, sudden blaze of lightning. In the background of the noise, and out of the corner of his eye, he catches the chairs from the table dragging out across the floor, toppling over. 

“Never mind,” he says. “I’ll drive.”

“I’ll, uh—I’m just gonna grab a few things,” Vanya says, ducking her head and hurrying past him. 

He grabs her arm as she moves beside him. He tries not to notice the way she flinches, and lightens his grip. 

“It’s okay,” he says. 

Vanya smiles at him. It doesn’t really look convincing, but she nods, and then hesitates like she does almost every single time before. He hugs her tight for a few seconds. She’s skinny. Her and Klaus both. 

Maybe they’ll stop by Griddy’s for a bit.

“Thanks, Diego,” she says, stepping away. 

He huffs. “Just get your shit and let’s get out of here.”

Vanya nods, goes to her bedroom, just out of sight. Diego sighs again, turning and hovering the flashlight across the room to survey the damage. 

It isn’t that bad, actually. She just needs to work on her control.

“By the way,” Vanya says, calling from the other room. “Um, are you missing a leather jacket?” 

Diego grits his teeth, scrubs one hand down his face and shakes his head. 

“That little shit,” he says. 

At least it makes Vanya laugh. And besides—maybe wearing something of Ben’s isn’t that bad. 

**Author's Note:**

> It’s BROAD DAYLIGHT, and im posting something??? this is new for me, im nocturnal. but it’s also sat, and i don’t have work today! which means im being incredibly lazy and procrastinating absolutely ~everything~ Aside from this. Hope u guys liked it, i love u, xoxo and for once, good afternoon!!!
> 
> Ps. Diego can hold his breath for like ever in the comics. He is also apparently blonde...? hmm...yeah. i like him dark haired better.
> 
> PS. Yet again...I have one more chapter of this planned and then a time skip, i think. And that’s where i might shift it to a ‘new’ series so this one isn’t so damn long? It’ll be canon timeline i think....and maybe a new poem of Ginsberg’s. We’re talking same content, new cover rebrand....and i might also post a ‘bonus’ chapter of my scraps! Stuff that never made it in here. pls lmk ur thoughts  
> ok NOW good afternoon i love u xoxo


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